Tell Me a Story: Gregory LaMontagne

By Gregory LaMontagne (AGI ’20)

[Reprinted from Colloquy, Vol. 3, with permission from the author and editors.]

Remember what Ms. McIntosh said about answering multiple-choice questions? Go
with your first choice. With that in mind, fill in the circle in your Scantron which
corresponds with the best answer to the following question:

1. What should Greg’s next pursuit be after reading the Closing of the American Mind
by Allan Bloom and realizing his BFA in Musical Theatre left him hollower than
your last can of hairspray?

a. Stick to a lucrative contract to perform for the next eight months.
b. Run away to Seattle where his shallow friends and prying parents haven’t infiltrated yet.
c. Farm.
d. Attend a secular Great Books program in Annapolis, regardless of first impressions.

Easy. “a.”
Eight months later, your test returns, marked in red: “0/1”
You realize your mistake and confirm “b.”
A year later, your test returns, marked in red: “0/1”
Must be “c?”
Three months later—all right, all right, you get it, you get it.

You can’t regret what kept you, but you can’t help wishing you’d gotten here a whole
lot sooner.

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